House, Divided
 La Tempestad
 The Ballad of John Wesley Reed
 Girl Science
 The Allure of Oriental Wisdom
 Memorial Day (formerly Varia)
 Pride of the Lion
 The Dostoyevsky Man


 Monica for Chanukah
 Angie and Arnie Sanguine
 Edward and Ellie Supine
 The Lion Eats His Lunch
 The Lion in His Lair
 The Lion Leaves His Mark
 Prayers


 But Who's Counting?
 Emma Goldman Imagines the Millenium


 Just Before the War Between the Plates
 I Can Handle That


 Talking  with Lee Blessing

...with Tom Coash
...with Mary Fengar Gail
...with Richard Kalinowsky
...with Jamie Pachino
...with David Rambo
...with Jason Sherman
...with Naomi Wallace
...with Tom Gibbons
...with Dick Goldberg

I Can Handle That is a 9 character play, with 4 human characters and 5 characters that are luggage.

Synopsis:

Luggage awaiting claim, including the urgent shipment of a human heart, provokes consternation among the humans and fierce debate between baggage about whose contents have the most character.

Human Characters:

DUKE - Airport Baggage Handler - First Day on the Job
EARL - Airport Baggage Handler - A kind of know it all
CAPTAIN - Airport Baggage Handler - Duke and Earl's supervisor
DELIVERY DRIVER - Driver for a fast, fast, fast delivery service

Luggage Characters:

Regular Samsonite Suitcase
Green Duffel Bag
Classy Garment Bag
Silver metal (Haliburton) case
Cardboard Box

Playing time:

15 minutes

Sample Scene:

Can you believe those guys?

Typical.

Baggage handlers. They're all the same.

Red Caps, Sky Caps, even the Greyhound guys. What is it about handling baggage that makes a guy so...so...what is the word I want?

Obtuse? Can you believe after all these years they still don't think we understand them?

Humans.

Do you know that they don't think luggage experiences turbulence?

(Shuttering:) Turbulence. Uggh.

That's right. They are either tossing us around willy-nilly, or showing us total disregard. On to busses, off of busses. On to planes, off of planes. On to trains, off of trains. Heave-ho, dump and throw. That's how they treat us.

I don't think they think that luggage could possibly have feelings.

We just get bounced and trounced and jounced and we just silently take it.

They way they treat luggage, it's a good thing I'm made with canvas and grommets, the way bags was meant to be made. Or I'd...I swear I would...

You'd what?

I'd do something, that's for sure.

Oh please.

Like any of us could do anything.

(Still to Duffel:) You are the lowest, the most basic, the most...

You want me to knock the contents out of you, silver boy? I've seen your type before. One little dent and you are crying like a baby. Tough metal guy. What a joke. You're more fragile than that box there. Like you're carrying anything that anyone cares about anyway. You're all for show.

More important than anything you're carrying.

It is my experience that the ritzier the bag, the cheesier the contents. Real important stuff, like officer's uniforms or top-secret rocket parts, they trust to soft-sided bags.

What?

Sure. I knew a duffle bag once, all he did was carry top-secret stuff.

Right. Listen you cotton sack. No one would put top-secret stuff in a duffel bag. Did you see it?

Read my lips: IT WAS TOP-SECRET. No one could see it. Besides, that was the point. No one would ever think there was top-secret stuff in a duffel bag. Think about it.

(To Haliburton:) Don't pay attention to him. I've been traveling with guys like him for years and he's just full of...

Watch it.

I was going to say clothing.

(To Samsonite:) Yea, Mr. Purchased at Sam's Club on Sale, what are you full of?

You can't tell what's inside by looking at the outside.

Yea? Well listen. I got an idea. It'll be a few minutes before those yo-yo's come back, so let's make a little bet. We'll each tell a story about the best thing we ever carried. We'll make a rule: no lying. Then at the end we'll vote and see who has the best story.

What do we get if we win?

(To the box:) Like you have a chance.

Bragging rights.

I got them already.

(To Haliburton:) All right Mr. Totally Filled Up With Smarty Pants, you suggest something.

Stories about what we got inside.

Right. Got now, or had once. The best thing you ever carried.

All right. I'll go first.

For information about performance rights, contact Larry@Loebell.com